The Concubine

I love big life changes.

1. Job. Yes, I, Ana Karen Torres, have a job. A job that pays beautiful money. I also get to feel the pain of standing on my feet for long hours. Unfortunately this time I have to wear nice shoes. I also have to wear awful makeup and generally look like a chic douche.

2. Baby. I am such a pussy. My brother was born and he is beautiful. I swear I still hate babies! I can't believe I made it through such an intense, bloody procedure without fainting. I will never give birth.

3. News and Cooking shows. I am so happy when I watch both. I need to watch both every day. Need to.

4. France. Being taught French by such a wonderful teacher in such a great way makes my dream of fluency very attainable. Finding the blog Truffles for Breakfast shows me that it is definitely possible to move to France and become a French citizen. They don't even speak French well!

5. Chicago. I've decided I don't want to live my adult life here.

6. Cats. Cats are better companions than people.

7. Alone. I definitely prefer being alone. People are so disappointing and pathetic. I also definitely want to live alone the rest of my life. Unless I meet someone that I am unbelievably, mind blowingly compatible to live with--no thanks. I'll take cats.

I hate it when people are attracted to me and they show it. I'm pretty much an asshole to you if you like me. I'm an asshole if you look at me inappropriately. I wish no one was attracted to me. My cats are waiting for me to go to sleep. Need to clip my fails first. I hate long nails, always.